Sorry the blog's been a bit underpopulated for the last couple of days - I've been poorly sick. But here's a few things you might have missed (or seen elsewhere while I was away, natch).



:: Is this the biggest battle of the pop divas in the history of the cosmos?

Big guns Britney, Beyoncé, Christina Aguilera and Alesha Dixon (and Leona Lewis) all have singles out this week, while Girls Aloud have squeezed out their fifth studio album. Chart-wise, it looks like X Factor's not-quite-as-awful-as-you'd-expect version of Hero will be number one again, with Girls Aloud's The Promise at two and Beyonce's gramatically-incorrect If I Were A Boy at three. Meanwhile, Out Of Control looks set to beat Razorlight to the top of the album charts, giving Girls Aloud their first ever non-compilation number one. Amazing. [More on the midweeks at Music Week]

:: Jamelia has a comeback single, Break It Down, Tear It Up. It's miles better than the confused mess of her last album - but is it good enough to put her back where she belongs (somewhere between The Saturdays and McFly on the bill for T4 on the Beach)? The jury is out. [listen / download]

:: Another track from the Killer's new album, Day & Night, has leaked. No surprises here: Too many synths, Brandon Flowers not very good at singing, the track itself = brilliant.

The Killers - Spaceman


:: It's like a blogger's wet dream - M.I.A. covers the theme tune to The Wire. Sadly, it's rubbish. [Youtube (youtube)]

:: Is this a new Justin Timberlake single? Hmmm... it sounds a bit like a FutureSex/LoveSounds cast-off to me.

:: The NME has published its annual "cool list" - with entries for Jay-Z, Liam Gallagher, Amy Winehouse and, er, Peter Gabriel. The number one slot, as is customary, goes to someone the NME is trying to justify having put on their front page in April, despite the fact they've made absolutely no impact on anyone, anywhere in the intervening six months. This year, it's Alice Glass from Crystal Castles (they're like the Human League with all the tunes taken out). As Stereogum points out, the NME have once again confused "cool" with "notorious". [Stereogum]

:: A Kiss Is Not A Contract - but a baby is a life sentence (in a good way, obviously). Flight Of The Conchords star Jemaine Clement is a dad. Congratulations. [3 News, New Zealand]

:: Lukewarm S Club 7 reunion is lukewarm. [Popjustice]

:: Oh yes, and there was a completely historic, paradigm-shifting, momentous election in the US. Barack Obama is President elect (Yay!!!) and Will.i.am has written a song about it (woop!). And so has Nas (respect) and so has Seal (er, hooray?!)

Back to business as usual from tomorrow...

Labels: Alesha, barack obama, beyonce, britney, Christina Aguilera, flight of the conchords, Girls Aloud, Justin Timberlake, killers, M.I.A., Music, video

The usual routine at Discopop Towers is to spend Saturday and Sunday curled up on the sofa (leather) drinking wine (red) and watching tv (trash). But, this weekend, we ventured out into the real world of nightclubs, pubs and concerts.

It wasn't pretty.

It still hurts.

As a rsult, we've only just caught up with the reality TV behemoths that are X Factor (Diana to win) and Strictly Come Dancing (tee hee, isn't John Sergeant silly?). As luck would have it, two of our favourite Xenomaniac pop acts were performing on the shows - Girls Aloud supporting our Cheryl on ITV, and Alesha Dixon revisiting the scene of her strictly vict'ry at Television Centre.

Both performances were good, but there were subtle differences which can only be explained via the medium of the venn diagram. Here are three examples.


Fig 1: Sparkly dresses


Fig 2: Not enough time in "hair and make-up"


Fig 3: The Simon Cowell factor




Here are those performances "in full".

Alesha Dixon - The Boy Does Nothing


Girls Aloud - The Promise

Labels: Alesha, Girls Aloud, Music, video

It's a 10/10 song and dance extravaganza... But what do the Strictly Come Dancing judges make of it all??

Craig Revel Horwood: I thought Alesha was beautiful but she needs to eat a few more sausages. What I could see of the footwork was distinctly average. Bah, humbug, grumble, moan, gripe.

Arlene Phillips: SHE WENT UP LIKE A HOT AIR BALLOON AND EXPLODED LIKE A FIREWORK. HELLO? CAN YOU HEAR ME?

Len Goodman: I've afraid I've had a bit of a sherry and I have no idea what's going on. Is this on the telly? Can I have my bed now, please? Nurse?!

Bruno Tonioli: Darling, you have more wriggles than a wriggly worm. A fabulous wriggly worm shimmying in a smouldering dress. Hot and passionate like a Mexican chilli pepper in a sexy heatwave (**explodes**)


Fascinating.

Labels: Alesha, Music, video

Here's a quintuple dose of awesome to kick off your weekend:

1) Alesha Dixon's new single
Through the medium of mambo, Alesha is reaching out to her two, distinct audiences - (a) People who mourn the passing of Mis-Teeq (b) People who only know her because of Strictly Come Dancing.

The Boy Does Nothing is the name of the song, and I can prove to you how amazing it is in just 20 seconds:



There's more on Alesha's MySpace.

2) Ninja Cat is comin' to getcha



3) Ben Folds Five and Regina Spektor
My two favourite people who sit behind a piano and sing at the same time have sat behind two pianos and sung at the same time as each other. Result = Brilliance.

Ben Folds - You Don't Know Me (feat Regina Spektor


4) Barack Obama visits the West Wing
Aaron Sorkin takes time out from writing a movie about Facebook (the mind boggles) to imagine what advice The West Wing's Jed Bartlett would give the current Democratic Presidential Candidate.

:: Jed & Barack [New York Times] Warning: Socks will be blown off.

5) A Girls Aloud video with a budget in excess of £2.50

Girls Aloud - The Promise


Trivia: I interviewed Kimberley yesterday. She was tired, but very polite.

The End.

Labels: Alesha, ben folds, cats, Girls Aloud, MP3, Music, regina spektor, west wing

Good news: Alesha Dixon, formerly of Strictly Come Dancing and having-a-recording-contract fame is back with a new song.

Bad news: It is for a rubbish car commercial.

Alesha Dixon - Ford Focus advert

Labels: Alesha, Music, video

Welcome back! Hope you all had a tasty Christmas.

As promised, we spent part of the break in prison - where my mother-in-law is a chaplain. As you can imagine, Christmas morning with 40 inmates makes for a particularly unique church service. Especially when your (gorgeous) wife is the first civilian woman the men have seen for months, if not years.

But the best moment was when the congregation launched into the Christmas carols. You've never heard Away In A Manger until you've heard it with a sinister undertone of violence.

Aside from prison, we spent most of the holiday with our nieces and their Wiiiii. No Christmas telly at all, which is most unusual for me.

Before we set off for the in-laws, however, we did catch the final of Strictly Come Dancing, which I've become strangely addicted to. This year, justice was done and former Mis-Teeq shouty lady Alesha Dixon took the crown after 12 weeks of knockout performances. Here is one of them:

Alesha Dixon - Argentine Tango


Those of you who have followed Alesha's career will know that, despite a lack of formal training, she had a bit of a head start when it came to the competition, having performed routines both for Mis-Teeq and as a featured performer in NERD's She Wants To Move video. Comme ça:

NERD - She Wants To Move


I was hoping Alesha would use Strictly Come Dancing as a way to revitalise her stalled pop career. Her solo singles last year weren't of the highest quality but they showed a lot of promise. Bruce Forsyth has obviously been paying attention, though. He told Alesha she could be "Britain's Beyoncé", which is a good call for an old duffer.

Of course, this being the UK, the first thing Alesha has done to celebrate her victory is to accept a large amount of dosh to remove her clothes - in this case FHM. In the interests of "research", here are the pics:





So, will Alesha stage the first pop comeback of 2008? Watch this space...

Labels: Alesha, Music, video

Despite my heartfelt plea last week, Alesha's new single, Knockdown, went into the charts at a shockingly poor number 45.

We canvassed some music fans for their opinion. Here's what they said:

Sandra Green, Lab Technician
I was so upset that I stuck my hand to my face with superglue.


Anna Nomaly, Botanist
Was I supposed to go out and buy it? Isn't it enough to add Alesha to my myspace friends? Sheesh.


Alex Smalldog, Thermonuclear Scientist
Woof! Woof woof woof! Woooooof!


Toby Oxford, Metal Wrangler
I worry that this will have a chilling effect on the careers of those other two out of Mis-Teeq.


Jessica Fnaeuil, Kindergarten Student
This cheese tastes a bit funny.

Labels: Alesha, humour, Music

Alesha Anjanette Dixon from out of Mis-Teeq has a new single out today. It is very good.

The song is called Knockdown and it is written by Girls Aloud's hitmaking production gurus Xenomania. "They" are very good, too.

The video, which you can see here, features a wonderful selection of hats. Les Chapeaux, as they are called in Romania or whatever, are so in right now, fashion fans.

Observant viewers may recall that I have slagged this song off before, but it turns out I was wrong. It's a proper little grower and no mistake. You'll be singing it in your bath or alternative body-cleansing appliance before the week is out.

The problem is, people aren't buying pop music at the moment. Why? Because they are fools. Yes, your Razorlights and your Corrine Bailey Raes are all very lovely and mellow - but kids are going to need something to dance to at hilarious retro discos in the year 2018, and You're fucking Beautiful simply will not do.

In addition, Alesha is super ace and the saviour of pop music. But her last single only went to number 14 and, with record companies being what they are (global corporations with responsibilities to shareholders who'd rather see a man spanked by seven midgets in a banana boat than go to a pop concert), if this song doesn't go top 10, she's out of a job. Which is shit, obviously.

So it is up to you, the seven readers of Discopop Directory, to purchase this pop gem forthwith. It is in shops of the traditional high-street variety and the spooky electric ones too.

To help persuade you, Alesha has recorded a little video message for the world's best pop website, and I have nicked it wholesale reproduced it here in full.



International viewers may need to look at the following video for context.



Also, international viewers may need to move to the UK to buy the single. But it's worth it. Honest.

Labels: Alesha, Music

What has improved since Alesha's previous single Lipstick?

The haircut

The dance routine

The lyrics

What has not improved since Alesha's previous single Lipstick?

The song

The height of her trousers

The likelihood of scoring a hit single

Oh dear.

Labels: Alesha, Music

1) Yayyyy! Shouty pinhead Alesha Dixon, what was in Mis-Teeq, has put some groovy solo material on Myspace. Assuming this is the throwaway, non-single, material we have plenty to look forward to when she launches her comeback later this year.
Click it!

2) Arrrrgh! The man behind the cancelled / reinstated / cancelled sitcom Arrested Development says he's walking away from the show. But 20th Century Fox hint (again) that the show might come back. Stop the madness!!
Click it!

3) Ewwwww! Ryan Seacrest is smooching Teri Hatcher. Gross.
Click it!

4) Ooooooh! Get tickets for sell-out concerts at face value from other fans! Altruistic website Scarlet Mist beats the touts (and Ebay).
Click it!

5) Gotcha! Actor Joseph Gordon Levitt papparazzes the papparazzi, and puts a film about it on the web. You like? We like.
Click it!

6) Finally! You know how we were going on about how great old videogame soundtracks were yesterday? (yes, of course you do) Well, the super mario theme seems to have some rather odd devotees. Watch below as a teenager plays the song on two guitars at once. For no apparent reason.

Or, indeed, these people doing it a capella. For no apparent reason.


That is all.

Labels: Alesha, Games, links, TV

The diet Destiny's Child, Mis-Teeq, have split up. Which is a great shame, as they were actually a decent British pop act.

The blame must lie at the door of Telstar, who went bankrupt and left the band with nothing to show for their eighteen million appearances on TOTP Saturday.

Mis-teeq: I will miss your finely crafted pop/r&b tunes with the occasional deranged shouty bit on the m.i.c.

CBBC Newsround: Mis-Teeq split after eight years

Popjustice: Tribute

Labels: Alesha, Music