"Any critic who has the audacity to subtract even half a star off this show will be smacked in the fucking face," opined Kanye West as his two-hour set at the O2 drew to a close. He then defied anyone in the audience to name another concert that even approached the untrammelled genius of his stage spectacular.

Well, since he asked:
1) Prince - Lovesexy
2) Madonna - Reinvention tour
3) U2 - Zooropa
4) Jay-Z at Glastonbury
5) Sly and the Family Stone at Woodstock
6) Etc, etc

So what went wrong for Kanye?

First of all, despite hiring what he boasted of as "the best lighting designers in the world", there were no spotlights to follow the on-stage action - the result being that Kanye spent most of the night shrouded in silhouette. Even on the video screens. The tour was called Glow In The Dark, not Alone In The Dark. Strike one.

West also described how hard he worked to give the concert a narrative with "artistic merit". The plot, however, was a sub-Ed Wood space fantasy about Kanye being stranded on an alien planet with only a randy computer called Jane (!)for company. Strike two.

Lastly, the evening contained the most baffling, disorientating 15 minutes I've ever witnessed in a live show, as Kanye embarked on a semi-improvised, semi-musical, semi-coherent lament to his late mother.

Over a sparse bass figure, he shouted down God for robbing him of his soulmate, while making detours to discuss the paparazzi, the costs of fame, stage fright, his fractured relationship with Jay-Z, bloggers, the economic dowturn, Barack Obama, trying to sell his house in LA, the possibility of space travel and, frighteningly, the fact that he had recently been "a week away" from comitting suicide. All while staring sullenly at his shoes. It was by turns touching, upsetting and terrifyingly bonkers.

Strike three? Well, not quite...

Having got all tha bile off his chest, West's spirits seemed to pick up and he attacked the show's hit-heavy final segment with frantic brio. Hearing the likes of All Fall Down, Through The Wire, Gold Digger and Stronger performed back to back with such gusto makes you realise what a prolific and accomplished songwriter Kanye is. His earlier assertion that music was the only way to drown out his demons added an extra layer of emotional resonance to the final half hour of the show.

So, while it wasn't the earth-shattering, boundary-breaking audio-visual feast Kamye believed it to be, Glow In The Dark was still a remarkable, memorable and monumentally conceited pop concert.

Verdict: (And I am ready for my beating now).



Best bits: The extended singalong on Can't Tell Me Nothing; Estelle's surprise appearance for an encore of American Boy.

Worst bit: Four 'aliens' (lampshades) telling Kanye: "You're the most famous person in the universe."

Labels: kanye west, Music, Review

Kanye West's career can be charted, on an actual chart, by plotting the cost of his videos in proportion to the quality of his music. Here is the pudding within which the proof is contained.



And here is West's latest video masterpiece / hopeless song.

Kanye West - Heartless

Labels: kanye west, Music, video

It seems Kanye West is persisting in plugging new single Love Lockdown, despite the public's overwhelming reaction to the song being "eh?"

The newly-released video is a Jacko-style expensefest, featuring a huge tribe of African warriors and a pointless CGI spaceship in an attempt to distract from West's horribly weak vocals.

It fails.

Labels: kanye west, Music, video

Kanye West and frequent collaborator / former mentor Common have both released quirky, animation-led videos in the last week.

West's is a technicolour marvel, pieced together by postmodern commericial art wunderkind Takashi Murakami. Common's is almost monochrome, but no less eye-catching, with a grafitti-inspired comic strip feel from Hype Williams protege Lil' X.

Both are smashing, but Kanye's is more of a treat for anime geekboys, while Common's is full of eye candy for da ladeeeeez (it says here).

The question is, which is best? Watch and vote, my lovelies.

Kanye West - GoodMorning (Official Video)


Common - Announcement

Labels: common, kanye west, Music, video

...In his new video, where a Kanye mannequin competes in the Olympics. Except it's not really the actual Olympics at all because of the intricacies of international copyright law.

As regular readers know, we're big fans of puppets in music videos, so we applaud the idea of a fuzzy felt Kanye West. But is it a successful promo in its own right?

Only a mathematical diagram can help to answer this conundrum:



Oh well.

Labels: kanye west, Music, video

Radio One have been playing this for months, but it's only just got a video:

Kanye West ft Chris Martin - Homecoming


Do you know what? It's a great song, but all I think of when I see the video is "Oh crap, Coldplay have a new album coming out this year".

Labels: coldplay, kanye west, Music, video

Only one person in the world has listened to the super-groovesome bubbling electrofunk of Estelle's new single American Boy and thought to themeselves: "Hmm, this song is totally flat and lifeless".

Unfortunately, they hired that person to direct the video.

Estelle - American Boy


Presumably the director suffers some kind of reverse synesthesia (the neurological condition where you experience words and sounds as colours). That can be the only reason he has turned in such an uninspired, one-dimensional black and white video, when the song clearly screams out for a sun-kissed, bleached out, hand-held Super 8 film, with Estelle riding around Miami in an open-topped Chevrolet.

PS: If Kanye West is so great at rapping, why can't he think of a word that rhymes with seats other than... erm, seats?

Labels: estelle, kanye west, Music, video

In order of appearance...

Mika: Insufferable
Beth Ditto: Underused
"The" Osbournes: Grotesque
Take That: Bless
Klaxons: Which ones are the Klaxons?
Rihanna: Hoodie

Fearne Cottons... Now wait a cotton-picking minute (do you see what I did there?)

Why are the public being allowed to decide who wins the Best Single award? The shortlist is already based on the top-selling records of the year, so why not just give the prize to the one that sold the most (Leona Lewis). The phone-in element just ruins the pace of the show, and cheapens the whole affair. They don't let you phone in at the Oscars, do they? No wonder none of the important acts turned up. They thought it was the bloody X Factor.

Adele: Guv'nor
Mika again: Vomitous
Kylie: Not really dancing
Kelly Rowland: Not really Beyoncé
Kanye West: Numbskull
Mark Ronson: Even the voiceover lady points out he shouldn't be given Best British Male
Kaiser Chiefs: Just awful
Kylie again: Best International Female? What must Rihanna think?



Leona Lewis: Wow!



Foo Fighters: Sarcastic
Kate Nash: Fuck off. For the love of God, fuck off.
Foo Fighters: Cheeky
Mark Ronson and Adele and Daniel Merriweather and...
Amy Winehouse!!!!: Jaw-droppingly, monumentally fantastic.



Arctic Monkeys: Girls Aloud wuz robbed
Amy Winehouse again: Wobbly
Take That: Cuddly
Arctic Monkeys: Smirksome
Paul McCartney: Hello, granddad.

And that was the Brits. See you next year, eh?

Labels: arctic monkeys, brits, kanye west, kylie, mark ronson, mika, rihanna, take that

Kanye West has just posted a very odd teaser trailer for his new single, Flashing Lights, on his personal blog.

There's no indication how much of this clip will make it into the finished video, but the basic premise is that a woman drives into the desert with Kanye bound and gagged in the boot of her car. She then sets about his knackers with a giant spade.

Kanye West - Flashing Lights


I once had a dream exactly like that.

Labels: kanye west, Music, video

Canadian musician Colin Munroe has an album coming out later this year. You won't have heard of him, so he's covered Kanye West's sumptuous Flashing Lights in an attempt to "create a buzz on the blogs".

Like Wile E Coyote to his Roadrunner, I have fallen for it.

Colin Munroe - Flashing Lights


I like how he's traded Kanye's braggadocio for a soupçon of self-effacing humour. "Your girls are fine - it seems a dime or two in every dozen / I only wanted one, but I'm no-one, so I get nothin'".

It's a little disengenous, though, as Munroe is definitely a "someone". People with a thing for Canadian urban music might recognise his name as a writer and producer for acts like Ray Robinson, Divine Brown, Brown Saucepot and Frank N Dank (I only made one of those up).

Anyway, the cover version is a great calling card. I'll keep an eye out for his solo material and see how things develop...

[via Mixtape Maestro]

Labels: kanye west, Music, video

Last year, Kanye West got his knickers all in a twist because MTV had the audacity to give a prize to Justice vs Simian instead of him. According to the judges, or the public, or whoever votes for the channels European Music Awards these days, the dance act's lo-fi video for We Are Your Friends was better than Kanye's lavish Touch The Sky clip.

In a moment of unfettered genius, Kanye stormed the stage, grabbed some guy's microphone and ranted: "My video cost a million dollars, Pamela Anderson was in it, I was jumping across canyons and shit" (he means 'etc', not that he was jumping over a doggy poo - Ed).

MTV was unmoved by the playground display - Justice got to keep the award and, just to make a point, MTV refused to give Kanye any prizes at this week's US ceremony. Harsh.

As always, however, Kanye has the last laugh. For his new single, he has poached Justice vs Simian's video director, So Me, the very man whose microphone he stole at the MTV awards.

And the results are very, very good indeed. Think of a rap version of Sesame Street, and you will get the picture.

But here's the $1m question: Is it as good as the Justice video? Take a look:

Kanye West - Good Life


Justice vs Simian - We Are Your Friends

Labels: justice, kanye west, Music, video

It's been a long while since I posted a batch of fresh MP3s for your aural pleasure, so here is a selection of the songs I've been playing in the last 24 hours (I left out the Hootie and the Blowfish song, for reasons of taste and decency).

Gabrielle - Why?
I know what you're thinking: Gabrielle? Why? If I told you the song also features Paul Weller, you'd probably be sick into your shoes. But guess what? It's actually really good. So Ner ner ner ner ner to you.

Reverend and the Makers - He Said He Loved Me
I warned you all about this weeks ago. It is still brilliant, and headed north in the charts as we speak.

Groove Armada - Song 4 Mutya (Panic Remix)
This is the extended version of my favourite song of the summer, Groove Armada's Out of Control (Song 4 Mutya). This is a perfect example of how extended mixes used to be in the 1980s, teasing out all the hidden elements of the song into a joyous six-minute dance epic (I particularly love the New Order-esque guitar riff). This mix is also a little bit faster than the original, so your toes may get fatigue from all the tapping.

Bruce Springsteen - The E Street Shuffle
Don't laugh. I was brought up on the Boss and the Boss = ace.

Jennifer Lopez - Do It Well
This is the new single from Jennifer Lopez who, as we all know, is a triple threat. This means she can sing, dance and act, not that she is a terrorist who picks on the handicapped and rapes goats. Probably.

ZZT - Lower State of Consciousness (Justice Remix)
Here we have an instrumental remix of a song I have never heard by a band I know nothing about. It is rather splendid.

The Tough Alliance vs. Taken By Trees - Taken Too Young
An exceptionally pretty / haunting europop cacophony, with "ethnic" percussion, a spooky children's choir and a gossamer melody. It's beautiful, although ultimately destined for a Hed Kandi chillout compilation and nothing else.

All of the songs can be downloaded in one handy batch from zShare or megaupload. You can thank me later.

(Some of these songs were discovered on Pitchfok and disco delicious and Arjan Writes. So thank you to them.)

Labels: gabrielle, jennifer lopez, kanye west, MP3, Music, mutya, reverend and the makers

Some vacuous entertainment for your eyes on a Friday afternoon...

This poster was pinned to the gate of Paris Hilton's home in LA. Particularly nasty / brilliant is the description of Lohan as a "freckle-bellied cokewhore terrier".

Q: Is Salma Hayek still pregnant?
A: No, she is hiding a leg of ham up her nightdress. That is definitely what it is.

FACT: Kanye West is a tit.

US Weekly didn't look closely enough at this photo before they published...
Or perhaps that's a real thought-bubble coming out of Amy Winehouse's ear?

Isn't it sickening that someone could be this hot after a nine-hour transatlantic flight? (Answer: Yes, it is)

Crikey! Haven't the Sugababes let themselves go?
(Er, are you sure this isn't Beyoncé and her mum? -Ed)

Labels: amy winehouse, beyonce, Girls Aloud, kanye west, lindsay lohan, salma hayek

Awesome

Labels: kanye west, Music, video

Gold Digger aside, Kanye West's last album was a big ol' bag of bollocks. A self-aggrandising ego stroke, with little of the insight, wit, or playfulness of his stand-out debut, The College Dropout.

Clearly, West thought so too. He reneged on his promise to release three albums in three years and went back to the drawing board. Now he's ready to emerge from his hip-hop hidey hole, and has "leaked" (released) an official mixtape featuring some of his new tracks.

At first, it seems as though he's retreated slightly from the egomania that caused him to proclaim "I'm carrying the whole of hip-hop" in 2005. "I feel the pressure, under more scrutiny. And what do I do? Act more stupidly," he confesses in the first couple of minutes.

But he can't restrain himself for too long. By the half-way point, he has launched into a three minute diatribe about being misquoted in the press. Boo fucking hoo, you big girl.

The songs are rather good, though. West hasn't been refiling through obscure racks of dusty vinyl for his samples - I spotted Daft Punk, Deee-Lite and Peter, Bjorn and John amongst the backing tracks - but he has always been an excellent producer, twisting familiar hooks into audacious new shapes like a clown making a daschund out of a balloon [stop murdering this metaphor right now - ed].

The best tracks, however, are the non-West ones. Lupe Fiasco wrestles Thom Yorke's Eraser into a spooky hip-hop pressure cooker on Us Placers; Kid Sister goes day-glo on her ode to varnish, Pro Nails; and Common once again proves his lyrical genius by dropping in a reference to Finding Nemo on The People.

My guess is that West is behind all three of these tracks (he appears as a guest on two of them), but by contrasting other rappers' flow with his own - rather dreary - delivery, he ends up giving weight to the argument that, College Dropout aside, he should have remained behind the mixing desk.

Download links: (the file keeps getting deleted, so you might have to do a bit of searching on technorati if the links have expired)
Hip Hop Planet
The Rap Up
RJ's GFX and Music
The Leak Source
My Hip Hop

Tracklisting

01. Kanye West - Friday Morning, May 25th, 2007 (Intro)
02. Kanye West - Stronger (Snippet)
03. CRS (Lupe Fiasco, Kanye West & Pharrell) - Us Placers
04. GLC - I Ain't Even On Yet
05. Kanye West - Can't Tell Me Nothing
06. Common feat. Kanye West - Southside (Snippet)
07. Common - The Game
08. Kanye West - Porno (Interlude)
09. 88 Keys feat. Kanye West & Malik Yusef - Stay Up (Snippet)
10. Talib Kweli feat. Kanye West - In The Mood
11. Bentley feat. Pimp C & Lil' Wayne - C.O.L.O.U.R.S.
12. Kid Sister feat. Kanye West - Pro Nails
13. Kanye West - Young Folks
14. Kanye West - Interviews (Interlude)
15. Common - The People
16. Big Sean - Get'cha Some
17. Consequence - Don't Forget Em
18. Sa-Ra - White! (On The Floor)
19. Ne-Yo feat. Kanye West - Because Of You (Remix)
20. T-Pain feat. Kanye West - Buy You A Drank (Remix)
21. Kanye West - Throw Some D's (Interlude)
22. Kanye West - Throw Some D's (Remix)
23. Tony Williams - Dreaming Of Your Love
24. Really Doe feat. Jennifer Hudson - Magnetic Power
25. PM - Hater Family

Labels: kanye west, MP3, Music

MTV.com reports that Lauryn Hill has been collaborating with Kanye West on some new tracks. Perhaps there will be a sequel to 1999's "Miseducation of..." after all.

Lauryn must be in a forgiving mood at the moment. The collaboration comes only a year after she stopped West from sampling her vocals on "All Falls Down". There are even signs that she's relenting in her feud with Wyclef, which has kept the Fugees from reforming for the past seven years.

What a beautiful tale of human forgiveness. I'm welling up.

MTV: Kanye West Collaborating With Lauryn Hill

Labels: kanye west, lauryn hill, Music